You can be proactive and contact your lender as soon as you realize that there is trouble coming. You can be completely open and honest with your lender, but you may want to seek second mortgage foreclosure help from a professional first, which you can explain your financial difficulties and the problems in your life that have brought this situation about. A credit-yogi advisor can help you with any attempts by the lender to contact you or to inform you of the status of the foreclosure process; tracking all phone calls and letters. This can help you face the situation openly and honestly, and give the lender no reason to mistrust you. It will also help your lender become aware that you are honestly trying your best to work your way through this difficult situation.
Trying to achieve a forbearance agreement with your mortgage company is also an option. In such an agreement they may agree to accept only interest payments until you can get back on your financial feet. Without help it may be unlikely that they will accept an attempt to modify the mortgage, but there are many third party advisors or lenders who may help you. Given changes in the home equity loan rates and the ability of these companies to adjust the term of the mortgage, you might be pleasantly surprised at how much such a company could help your situation. Ideally, you could be in a position to get a new mortgage after foreclosure.
If you cannot achieve a refinancing, perhaps because face a reverse mortgage foreclosure or your mortgage is upside down, talk to your advisors about the possibility of a short sale. While this is a losing proposition on the face of it, savings over the costs of riding the process out to the bitter end may make this an attractive option.